1.Check me out! I'm a bike with a kickstand!
Actually, B and J were able to remove my bandage today, replacing my peg leg from yesterday with a hairless, stapled, sore leg that resembles a turkey drumstick.
2. Oh, take your pick. I'm an easy target right now. Cement mixer, modernist lampshade, satellite dish, whatever... At least I get good reception. I can't even get this picture to flip over but I'm leaving it this way so that you, dear reader, can have just a little taste of how much I just don't care right now.

This whole surgery thing has really messed with my joie de vivre. The Great Oppressors will never get away with this. Seriously, they had better not $%^& with me.
Step off, people...