Sunday, March 11, 2007

Conspiracy Nuts

There is a disturbance in the Force. Meet "Twiggy," the famous Water Skiing Squirrel.

Twiggy never goes in the water without her little squirrel-sized lifejacket and is an advocate for water safety, traveling to boat shows around the country in her custom RV and spreading the good word about tips like entering the water feet first while jumping in. This is either another example of exploitation on the part of the Great Oppressors or the squirrel is planning something. I just don't trust her. Look at the beady little eyes. According to the site, Twiggy's "parents" have also trained two miniature horses, two French poodles, a black cat, an armadillo and a toad frog to water ski. I'm willing to guess the animals haven't been allowed to form any sort of worker's union.

Water safety is very important, don't get me wrong. J had some acquaintances who went to Lake Havasu every year in college who brought back tales of near-drownings coupled with fraternity/sororiety debauchery. It sounded awful, an entire reservoir filled with watercraft containing college students making bad decisions. When I saw Twiggy's website, I had visions of "Twiggy Goes to Lake Havasu." She'd spend the entire spring break riding behind her little motorized speedboat, making laps around rented watercraft filled with drunken frat boys playing quarters and beer pong in the hot sun, all the while Twiggy's "mom" Lou Ann shouting at the college kids through a megaphone trying to get them to wear PFDs and wait at least an hour after taking another Jaeger shot to get back in the water.

The streaming video available at Twiggy's official site is really the best way of getting a full sense of Twiggy's glory, but here is a small taste of Twiggy on YouTube. Enjoy!


Tin Tin Blogdog said...

Sorry, but that's just wrong.

Snow skiing, now that would be different.

She looks tasty though, doesn't she?

Chow for now,

Tin Tin xo

Sid the Dog said...

Tin Tin-
You're right... She looks DELICIOUS. My Great Os knew someone who accidentally ran over a squirrel snow skiing once. A tragic accident only compounded by the fact that I wasn't there to devour the carcass.


Peanut said...

I knew there was something wrong with squirells. Water skiing that is just wrong.

wally said...

hey sid,

a water skiing squirrel would drive my sister crazy. it might be a good way to keep her busy.

happy paddy's day. i hope you're nearly passed out from the celebrating already.


wally said...

and let me add: hic!