Sunday, October 15, 2006

Evil Clowns

So, it hasn't been a great weekend. As a result, I feel like taking myself too seriously today. My young male playmate down the street even tried to hump me this morning, something he's never done before, and I can't help but think of it as a sign that the world is going downhill. I'm beginning to expect that my blogging experiment may have run its course. After all, surely there are better outlets for my creativity? Something more respectable, like the visual arts... For instance, I have always wanted to go back to school and try my hand at painting again. Here is a clown painting I made in my youth.

It's not much to look at, I know. But come on, I'm a dog. At least I can sign my name. It's decidedly non-edgy, which might be what you'd expect from an animal who gets regular walks, affection, a spot on the couch, the occasional table scrap, good access to medical care, and enough free time to do extravagant things like blogging about myself. There's not much ambiguity here. Non-threatening clowns? Cool. It's hard to get worked up about clown paintings in gilt frames any way you slice it. Cute. Great. Good dog, Sid. Nice painting.

But I'm not really feeling like the clowns in my painting are really representative of my inner feelings right now. Besides, the eyes are completely out of proportion. My mood being what it is right now, I feel somewhere in between Pennywise the Clown from Stephen King's "It...."

...and the evil clown doll who attacks Robbie in "Poltergeist."

I'm going to get abstract and pensive here since I don't feel like being witty today. I feel like being serious and dark and arty. Mysterious. J once made a point of turning in piece after piece of "evil clown art" after her junior high school art teacher informed the class that "all art should be beautiful." J's ouevre included a devil clown sculpture, a devil clown mosaic, and numerous drawings of clowns with sharp teeth. Junior high was not a particularly good time for J (from what I can gather, it isn't a particularly fun time for most young teens), but releasing the evil clowns and putting them down where everyone could see them felt good even if she got the impression that nobody knew quite what to say.

Personally, I am feeling like I could use a good piece of evil clown art today. Something with horns and teeth. Not to get all philosophical or anything, but I think we all need to acknowledge that we all have the capacity to be evil clowns in whatever we do. We all need to acknowledge our evil clown and ask ourselves how we choose to deal with it. Do we let the evil clown do whatever it likes? Do we file down the teeth? Do we keep ourselves and our evil clown locked in the basement, out of sight? Perhaps we chain the clown up like the Gimp in Pulp Fiction and bring him out for parties and special events when we need a little evil clown to keep us sharp. But upon reflection, I do not think that the clown can be eliminated from our lives or sent on a predetermined path like a wind-up doll. He sits there in the corner of the room with his pointy yellow teeth and eyes until he rises up and pushes us from behind into a wall. This lets us know that he is still there with us. Our inner evil clown.


Kaluah-lu said...

Sid my love,

I totally empathize with you. I believe you speak to the duality of the universal struggle which remains forever constant: laughing on the outside while crying on the inside.
Are we never to feel elation without the gnawing pangs of guilt, remorse, or worry?

Sid the Dog said...

I think we shall never experience pure elation until the day when the warm confines of the Bacon Bridge surround us. It is a sad fact that by taking action to move ourselves forward and engage life, we often act in haste and therefore must face a certain amount of regret stemming from that haste. But we must laugh, nonetheless, at our own situations.

Speaking of which, I thought of your post on the mechanics of anal glands the other day when I was experiencing some, uh, discomfort. To those of you who haven't read it, head on over to Lulu's blog and find that post! It's better than WebMD!

Tin Tin Blogdog said...

Ooooh Sidster,

I'm hearin' ya.

Except mine's an inner evil cat.

Mostly she's wandering just outside my front door, just out of reach, taunting me like the dickens, driving me crazy, being all smelly and teasing and...

...ummmm actually that was a real cat.



Hope you're not bordering on coulrophobic, are ya?

Send 'em in, I say. The clowns, that is.

Chow for now,

Tin Tin xo

Anonymous said...

Yo Sid. Get yo ass up here to visit. I'll cheer you up!

- Miles

Sid. You can hump me as much as you want, sigh, everyone else does. Apparently, I am chocolately delicious.

- Selma

Sid the Dog said...

Tin Tin-
Indeed, there ought to be clowns. I thought I had an inner cat once, but I believe it may have just been gastrointestinal distress.

Miles and Selma-
Would LOVE to pay you a visit. A little black/choco loving in H-town sounds grand...

Anonymous said...

Sid so gloomy today! You sound like you need a big pile of poo to roll around in! Shake it off beautiful!

Bussie Kissies

p.s. Heya - are you gonna do the DWB X-mas card exchange? I am, an I'd like to get a card from you! (Don;t tell Lulu, kay?). Remember hon, it's the season, not the reason!

Sid the Dog said...

Hmm... The big pile of poo sounds intriguing... Would I have to get a bath?

The card exchange sounds like fun! I think I should be able to swing the postage, although apparently J doesn't make much as a grad student so I'll have to be sneaky about how much I take from her purse at one time. And touche on the season not the reason!

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

My inner evil clown told me to steal the undergarments of the Mary Kay conventioneers, thus landing me in the pound. Since then, I have tried to ignore him.

Sid the Dog said...

Hmm... The evil clown came out at a convention for makeup. Interesting.... Very interesting... I wonder what Freud would say about this.