Friday, September 29, 2006

Thank God for Bacon

So, I've been thinking that all of the big religions have music to go along with their respective theologies. Contemporary Islam has devotional music called nasheed, and more traditional Muslims usually accept a cappella singing as halal (permissible) although the use of instruments is a subject of some debate. In addition to its well-known throat singing and chanting, Buddhism is associated with pieces of music known as honkyoku, which are part of a musical tradition surrounding enlightenment and alms dating back to the 13th century. Christianity has chorale music, Gregorian chants, "Stairway to Heaven," and "I've Got that Joy, Joy, Joy, Down in My Heart." (the passwords for the previous link are "1" and "1"). Clearly, music is an essential part of the religious experience.

The Rainbow Bridge does not have a song to go with it, although I'm sure that it's only a matter of time before someone turns the original composition into verse, breaks out their synthesizer, and turns the ethnocentric vision of the pet afterlife into a wretched MP3 that will make the rounds on the Internet. I don't think that our dog-centered theology needs to create a song just yet, but I'm going to get the jump on the Rainbow Bridge proponents by suggesting that we adopt the following bacon-themed tune as our theme song for the Bacon Bridge. Of course, howling and such will be the primary form of our musical tradition, but I think this particular song will fit in nicely in terms of our recruitment efforts since bacon for everyone is one of the primary tenets of the Bacon Bridge. Thoughts?


Anonymous said...

I got stalled at the title - BACON! But after about an hour of gazing upon that word, I did manage to read the rest of the piece. (Um, not piece of bacon, rather piece of blog.)

Bussie Kissies

Tin Tin Blogdog said...

Yeah I like the idea of having a 'theme' song.

I discovered this one, the Fast Food song, kinda covers a lot more bases than just bacon. See it at

But I'm happy with ANY food reference and happy to howl along at any time. (Do I get a treat as a reward?)

Chow for now,

Tin Tin xo

Sid the Dog said...

Buster- Just picture a place where the bacon is endless...

Tin Tin-
B and J have fond memories of this bizarre children's television program (Take Five?) they occasionally watched during their trip to New Zealand a few years ago. It contained a lot of musical numbers that bore a striking resemblance to the Fast Food song. I love how all of the Great Oppressors in that video are skinny despite their apparent passion for Pizza Hut and Kentucky Fried Chicken. That may have to be our theme song since I suspect that it will be running through my head for eternity now. Catchy tune...

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

As a leading canine religious scholar, I have often wondered whether bacon will become halaal in the afterlife. I pray that it is so.

Sid the Dog said...

I'm thinking that all forbidden foods will become halaal, kosher, non-fattening, etc. once a dog enters the land of the Bacon Bridge. If the Bacon Bridge is going to accept all dogs, and some compelling arguments posted in response to previous postings have convinced me that all dogs will go to there, all dogs will get to have bacon. This will apply not only to dogs who loved the earthly pleasures of bacon, but to those who chose to exclude it as a matter of faith but secretly desired its warm, salty, goodness. After all, appetite makes the best sauce, and a lifetime of resisting the siren call of bacon must build up a healthy hunger. Guilt-free bacon, ahh.... For those who still really don't want bacon, let us not forget the endless piles of biscuits, marrow bones, fish heads, and soft serve ice cream.

Simon said...

I have to say I am a really big fan of the bacon song. It is perfect.
As for the Gospel According to Simon here is my first draft:

If you shall smell a butt, so let your butt be smelled.

Hound, heeler, lab or mutt, we are all but one; Dog.

Bark, if thy bark, but bark bark only through bark's bark.

In dog's name we bark. Word be to bark.


Sid the Dog said...

Absolutely fabulous! The Gospel of Simon is totally in. I'm a big fan of the poetic structure as well. I may fashion the Gospel of Sid with a similar structure if that's okay...